Look at that, two entries in one day. So if you didn't read ...this one, there you go. (It's about my sexy, scandalous visit with Jerry. Half of that is true.)
Guess what I got in the mail today? Two birthday cards. Guess who they're from. (I don't know why I'm doing this guessing thing, I'll stop.) One from Kelsie, one from Michele. Weird. Can I tell you my stomach just dropped when I saw the envelopes in the pile of mail? I was like, scared. I don't really know what I was expecting. Michele's was cute, just a little note, it was nice. Kelsie's was, also nice, except for this sentence: "I don't want to get into the negative stuff because it's your birthday and birthday's are supposed to be fun!" Uhh. I think she's mad about my yearbook signing. I don't know. I had to tell her that stuff, I couldn't try to talk to her about it anymore, I couldn't be lame and fake in her yearbook... it wasn't mean, it was honest, and all I said was this year was hard and I missed being friends with her basically... Whatever, I don't regret it.
So. Then I was like, well I should call her and tell her I got the card. So I did. And it was sooo awkward at first. She totally sounded like she did not want to be talking to me. But then... fucking don't send me a birthday card! Aah! Then it loosened up a bit, kinda talked about summer, laughed a little. I don't know, she sounded kinda mean. Or tired. I said we should go to lunch sometime so I guess she's going to call tomorrow. Yeah we'll see how that goes. I keep thinking should I feel bad? But, whatever, I don't. Completely. It's just, ugh, she hurt me so much, she handled some things horribly and I know I wasn't perfect and I'm not happy with the way I did some things either but... I guess we just have to talk.
You know what was funny today? I told my mom I was holding out for John Mayer, and she decided I should go for Jason Mraz instead (easier to get, apparently)... I said unfortunately he's much too short (6' is my cutoff). Then she asked how old he was and I said "probably 24 or 25" and then I added (to test it) "that's a good age for me" to which she responded "Yeah, I think so." HA! Hell yes, my mom not only approves the older men, she recommends em! Now I just need one. Damn it. That was so not as great of a story as it could've been. Although, now if me and Jerry ever do hook up, "Mom, you even said yourself I should be with an older guy!" lol.
I don't know why I'm rambling about that though...
I need to get a job. Like, really. Jerry just laughed at me when I told him I quit... and that I still am not working... and that I applied at one store... He said, "Well, wait, when does your school start again?" And I was like (in a joking voice 'cause it's pathetic and he knows it) "yeah, um, I don't really know anything about that..." and he was all "It's in September, it's at like the very end of September, isn't it?! You have like 3 months of summer left, don't you? Ohhhhh.." Yeah. Oh so pathetic. Whatever.
This is kind of a lame rambling entry isn't it? I guess I should stop. I want to write but I so have nothing to say... I'm just real unfortunate tonight, kids. Oh well.
I do have some f'ing good lyrics for you though! :) seriously, so good.
"I wake up
Thoughts of you
Tattooed to my mind
As I wonder
What to wear
What to eat
Who to be
Will I see you again?
And as my car breaks down
I shake my head and say
What a day
If you only knew
What I went through just to get to you
I'm hanging from you
And I'll hold on if you want me to
Every bus, every train,
Every cab, every lane is jammed
So I looked to the sky
And I reached for the planes with my hands
If all my days go wrong
I'll think about last night
It went right
If you only knew
What I went through just to get to you
I'm hanging from you
And I'll hold on if you want me to
If you only knew
What I went through just to get to you
I'm swinging from you
And there's nothing I would rather do."
- Maroon 5 "If You Only Knew"
ohhh <333