I figured I'd better replace that entry. I'm not crazy, I don't really get that way ever, just about him & in here, I promise. :)

Anyway it has been one week and I'm just kinda over summer already. I'm so bored, oh my god. All I do is hang out with my mom, watch TV, go on the computer, etc. How lame am I? I do have a job, but I pretty much only work weekends. I would quit and get a job somewhere else, but I would probably make the same amount working all week there as 2 days a week at my place... with tips I get like $14+/hr, it's ridiculous. So I'll just stay with that, doesn't really matter.

Oh and I actually have about 2 friends left right now. Brenna left Monday for two months :( I miss her. And I don't think I'm friends with Kelsie or Michele at all anymore. So yeah, I basically have Lara and Brooke... Lara & I have been leaving eachother cell messages for the past 3 days, but I think she started her new job today. And I haven't gotten a hold of Brooke yet. I'll call her tomorrow, but she'll probably be working too.

You know I really just want to hang out with Jerry anyways. No he hasn't called yet, I'm totally not expecting anything tho... I figure he just interpreted it as "call if you can come." And he can't so he won't, or else he completely forgot which isn't entirely unlikely. I'll go visit him in a couple weeks, it'll be fine. The only thing that really matters is that we talk after I leave (email I guess), so if that happens then I'll be fine.

Anyway I guess I should spend my time doing like a hardcore work out regimen and getting really in shape, huh? I kind of want to actually... I've been wanting to run and do pilates again. Jerry totally brings that out in me I think... he's really athletic/in shape (football, but tall & lean, not really big or anything) and you know what? Even though I know there is no chance of a relationship ever, I might as well make him think about it for a second atleast. haha. I'll take him out for lunch right before I move and he'll be like, wait, now you're hot too? What am I going to do now? kidding... but almost ;)

That has always been the summer plan anyway. I think I'm about 156ish now. Goal being 130? Totally doable in, um less than 3 months hopefully? I will absolutely be doing that then.

Weird about Mary Kate Olsen, huh? I love those girls so much, they're so gorgeous, but it's weird thinking that now knowing she's anorexic. I don't know.

Oh and the running will be so much better now, because guess what I got for my graduation present? A mini ipod! It's green and sooo cute. I spent like all day Monday putting every freaking CD & mp3 into that damn thing... I'm not even done yet... but I <33 it. I'm listening to it on shuffle right now, which is so much fun - really good, older Sarah McLachlan and then some Jay Z and then the Police or something... it's cool listening to your music like that.

My birthday's in less than 2 weeks! 18... crazy huh? I was telling my mom how that means I'm almost, almost 'in my 20s' and she was like "NO IT DOESN'T!" lol.

You know what the best job ever would be? Just constant graduating. I sent out graduation announcements to my relatives and I seriously get $100 from all of them! It's ridiculous and I feel kinda bad about soliciting $$ like that, but what the hell I have like over $1200 in my bank account right now, so it's fine! haha.

"But I love the way you smile at me
I love the way your hands reach out and hold me near
I believe...
I believe this is heaven to no one else but me
And I'll defend it as long as I can be
Left here to linger in silence
If I choose to
Would you try to understand?"

- Sarah McLachlan "Elsewhere" Fumbling Towards Ecstasy