So things are a little better I guess. I'm definitely over the whole dance date not working out... it took like 10 minutes, lol. I realized I really don't like him anyway. We would have just been going as friends so it's not like the love of my life turned me down. And he didn't even technically turn me down, somebody else just asked him before I did. Plus he gets kinda annoying after extended periods of time... so it's fine ;)

I'm just still a little upset about not going. Everybody else is going together, and of course I feel really left out, which is just hard on top of always being left out in general, you know? And I can tell that Michele is somewhat glad b/c then she'll have no competition w/ Kelsie, which is lame. But she's pretty lame, so it fits I guess. I just have to get used to them talking about it with no regard for how I feel... wow, I really could never do that to any of them. Huh.

I guess I just wish I was going dress shopping and figuring out my hair & makeup and everything too... I've never had that opportunity. :( But I'm okay w/ the datelessness especially since all of them (except Nicole) are just going with friends (or "friends" in some cases, in my opinion. I'm betting Kelsie & her "friend" will get together eventually)

Notice how everything bad is happening to me all at once right now?? I guess it's that whole "when it rains it pours" concept. Friend issues & the dance thing & finals are all right now. But I feel like I'm pretty much okay with everything except Kelsie right now... I found out today that she went to Michele to talk about asking her date & that Michele came up with alot of it, and I'm just getting tired of being the second rate (if that) friend to her... why does Michele always come first if she swears I'm her best friend? And now they're going to be doing everything together w/ the dance. And then they'll get even closer. And then she'll be like, what? Natalie who? : I'm kind of kidding.

There's this guy who sits across from me in Physics and he's kind of quiet and pretty cute. I wish I could ask him but we don't really talk very much. Maybe I'll try to take advantage of tomorrow and see if there's any possibility there. I'm sure there's not. I know absolutely nothing about him other than his name and that he's a senior (I looked in the yearbook for that, 'cause otherwise I wouldn't bother... haha) He might have a girlfriend anyway. Oh well. The dance is 3 weeks from Saturday so it's probably too late either way. Doesn't matter!

The O.C. is on tonight, Britney Spears, Hilary Duff & Ben Jelen on TRL, and John Mayer is supposedly on "Ryan Seacrest" (??). I'm totally excited and that makes me so sad. How pathetic that my life revolves around TV... Well I think you can see why...

"With a taste of your lips
I’m on a ride
You’re toxic
I’m slipping under
With a taste of poison paradise
I’m addicted to you
Don’t you know that you’re toxic
And I love what you do
Don’t you know that you’re toxic."

- Britney Spears "Toxic" In the Zone

god those lyrics are bad. but i <33 the song anyway.