So you think things would get better, right? But no, not at all! Seriously, why do I freaking even bother with these people?! Like today at lunch we were all standing together, except Kirsten wasn't there, which is unfortunate for me 'cause she's my only friend who I can always count on to be nice to me, lol. Then Michele grabs Kelsie and takes her away for like 15 minutes (what the hell you guys). Then Lauren goes to turn in some forms & stuff (which is fine of course). Then Nicole leaves to go see her boyfriend. Then Erin leaves for no apparent reason (probably because Nicole left & I'm not good enough. Erin doesn't even try to pretend to be friends w/ me, even when I like "reach out" to her, even tho she was the one who totally complained to Michele that I didn't ever talk to her & that's why she never includes me in things. And this is after I appologized for that, which is crap b/c it's her deal. Whatever.) ...Then I'm left there alone with Lindsay who I don't know very well & Lindsay's friend who I don't know at all! They basically talk to eachother so I decide to just go to the bathroom & when I returned Michele and Kelsie were back, so it wasn't too pathetic. But still. Everybody just abandoned me like it was nothing...

Then when we were walking to our cars they all (Michele, Nicole, Kelsie & Erin) started talking about one of their inside jokes that (of course) I'm totally not in on. So I'm just standing there like... okay...

On top of all that, I found out today that pretty much everyone is going to ask a guy to the Winter formal (Sadie Hawkins style)... Kelsie never mentioned it to me (surprised?), but I was right, she's asking that one guy I talked about awhile ago in here. And Michele is going to ask her older brother's friend, who she says is her "last, last choice" which I think is completely crap. Actually I'm thinking she is freaking in love with the guy 'cause he's exactly like her older brother, which is so gross, but really true.

Either way, I am totally dateless. I'm not even sure I want to go. I mean I do, but with all of them? They're all so obnoxious. Especially as a group, lol! But I'm considering asking the guy who asked me last year (I didn't go). Because he's nice and, well, then I would get to go. That's sad. He's not really hot at all. Not like he's ugly, just, ehh. But I haven't spoken to him since that happened a year ago! But I kept getting signs today. And then they played a Dave Matthews song at lunch (1st time, ever) and I saw him give his friend a high five & sing the opening line. Which rocked because I thought me & Jerry were the only DMB fans there... maybe I should ask him.

It's pretty damn awkward though. When he asked me last year it didn't turn out so well. I was somewhat embarassed to go w/ him so I sorta lied to get out of it. Which is horrible, I know, I know, and I will burn in hell for it but... We'll see. I'll decide this week. Maybe I should...

Today's TRL was so good! Two awesome Maroon5 performances and Adam Brody!! <33

"This love has taken its toll on me
She said goodbye too many times before
Her heart is breaking in front of me
And I have no choice
'Cause I wont say goodbye anymore."

- Maroon5 "This Love" Songs About Jane