I started writing an entry last night, but Gilmore Girls was on so I didn't finish. It was about me and Kelsie and Michele. And how I've been trying so hard not to be jealous of them being friends, & how it's actually working! :)

I figured out that it doesn't even really bother me that much when Kelsie acts like she'd rather be around Michele sometimes, because when it's just us two, which it often is, we're totally fine. I don't want to be clingy or anything.

The part that I want to fix is how close we actually are. It's so funny because like... in the past 2 years we've been to Europe & the East coast together, and we're always together at school.. but we don't even call each other very often. And sometimes I won't see her on the weekends for like a month. Which I think is weird.

I think I really just want a true, real best friend, you know? So after college apps, when we're not so crazy busy I'll bring it up & tell her I want to like... solidify our friendship b/c otherwise I don't know what will happen when we leave next year. I guess just generally hang out more, talk on the phone more, etc. I'll let you know how it goes.

But otherwise, really, things have been good. I've been training myself to let go of things like that, because, well what do I expect? To be everyone's favorite & have all my friends only love me & not each other? Ew. Of course I am going to be left out of some things sometimes. I do it too! Whatever, it's not personal. So things are good :)

I saw the Making of the Video of Britney's "Me Against the Music" last night. I really like it, the song & the video. I don't know what the hell is up with the bright turquoise tie outfit & Madonna's white suit, but hey. B looks gorgeous as always. And the dancing is awesome of course! Quite inspiring.

Speaking of inspiring... my eating has not been. I've been feeling kinda icky lately, I think it's the weather (really hot like 97º) or something and I just don't know. I need to set a goal for Thanksgiving because:
1. My perfect cheerleader cousin Jessa is coming down around that time
2. We're going to take a family portrait for our Christmas cards then
(I know that's just family stuff, but still!) and...
3. CHRISTMAS -> presents -> clothes

Well I have 2 midterms tomorrow, including Physics (ugh) so I should probably go study. :(

Christina you're doing awesome, sweetie!

"It's whipping my hair
it's pulling my waist
the sweat is dripping all over my face
I'm the only one dancing in this place
to the beat of the drum
gotta get with the bass..."

- Britney Spears "Me Against the Music" In the Zone

yeah sorry that's kinda lame, couldn't think of another song ;)