there's yesterday's normal entry before this...

Oh it's not that bad, I promise! I don't want to totally give you guys the wrong idea. I have lots of friends and I'm pretty social, esp. at school, and I'm very confident in almost every aspect of myself except my body. And even then, I'm reasonably confident in my looks in general. It's not like I'm obese... I shop at Abercrombie & Nordstrom and I love clothes... I'm not miserable, swear.

The thing is, in "real life" I try to be fairly positive and optimistic or atleast have that sense around me most of the time, so sometimes the only place I feel like venting about my weight/friends/love life (or lack thereof) is here. So most of the time I guess you guys just kinda read about the extremes, you know? Like if something really good happens or (as it usually goes) something really bad, or little things that have been bothering me for awhile that I over dramatize. :)

I don't know, I mean yeah sometimes I do get kinda depressed about my weight and my body, and sometimes I feel like my friends are better friends than me or something like that, and sometimes I think I'll never get a boyfriend, but I'm generally a nice, happy person. I think.

That's not to say I don't want to change though. There is def. room for improvement & that's what I'm striving for I guess :)

Tonight's the Homecoming game! Hope there will be some (available) boys... (there won't be)... but whatever. I guess a realistic hope is that things will be good w/ my friends.

"If I could be your first real heartache
I would do it over again
If you could be my punk rock princess
I would be your heroin."

- Something Corporate "Punk Rock Princess" Leaving Through the Window & Audioboxer